i cant take this

why

why why why why

thats all folks

week 91

i am not happy with myself i went up 2 lbs this week and i am not happy. i worked sooo hard exercising this week. i walked like 10 miles from fri to weds and i go up?!? i know this is a long long journey but i need to get to goal. i am sick of the flab. i want to make it goal so i can help people. once i make it goal i can help kids, go on oprah and other tv stations. i just need to get to go for my emotional self. I know God has a plan for me but sometimes its really hard when i wanna get there because it will be 2 years in oct.

summer

summer is going sooooo great i am having a blast. I love hanging out with my friends and just having to not worry about school. But I cant wait to finish school because then my fat camp plans start rolling. my life is going soo great. God is soo good helping me with my weightloss and giving me a great church family. Everyone is such a support with my weightloss even people who i dont know. But I really wanna make it to goal!!! goal is on my mind lately. The sooner i make it to goal the sooner people notice me. The sooner i can get my plastic surgery on my arms and legs. I hope I loose this week. I have been going through a lot fo self image issues lately i am looking smaller but i have all this flab surrounding me. No one understands how it feels to weigh a lot and look like a human whale to going down to being sooo small. i cant even write down my feelings how it feels to be fat. its a totally different world.

i almost passed out

I decided to go on my normal walk to 90th to stirling to palm then around the island and dont forget about my little trip to the swings. Today it was sooo hott i almost about dehydrated and passed out. i need to start bringing water.

I need to make it to goal weight so i have to push it because i want to get there so bad. when i reach goal so many things can happen like getting to help kids loose weight and sharing ym story with the world!! i see people walking around who need to loose weight and i feel horrible. i want to share my story.

i love weight watchers :)

its been awhile...

I really have no clue who reads this but i hope you enjoy lol.

lately i have been going on really long walks during the day and listening to music. I have been dealing with some issues though. I want to get to goal really bad but sometimes its just hard. i still feel like im the fat girl in a smaller body. i feel like most guys are shallow and look at my fat and not me and all that i have accomplished. Sometimes I feel like all guys look at is looks and i need to not think like that because I know God has the right guy out for me. When I walk by groups of people it just feels people look at the fat and sometimes it hurts but I gotta get over it.

I saw batman on friday and I absolutely loved it and today i saw mamma mia which was soooo funny.

summer is going great minus the crazy things i tend to think!