I can do this

I listened to Tony Robbins thing on emotional eating and emotional eating doesnt have to be eating about anger or sadness it can be anything. Usually on weigh in night I get really hungry and eat and eat and eat. But tonight I tried to control it with deep breathing and and the quantity qualifier and it worked but not totally. I had ate my dinner I actually enjoyed my icecream bar for once without scarfing it down. Drinking my sparking water which is pretty good and I get this urge for another icecream bar. I was practically pulling my hair out. I wanted that second icecream bar and not just to enjoy just for something to do. I mean I was already watching tv and doing hw but I couldnt get my mind off that bar. It got bad and eventually I gave in but that was the only thing. I did great at dinner so all in all I am improving. It hurts deep down it hurts and swallow the spraking strawberry water and I feel it go down and I feel odd I cant explain. These last lbs are going to be a struggle but right now I am going to get these 8 lbs I put on off. Then I will work on the next and the next. I am fighting right now am I hungry or not. I can do this it will work just gotta use my brain it is all in there just need to move it in the right direction. This is something i will be praying about! :)

Biggest Loser brings me to tears tonight

Biggest Loser went to Texas tonight and did a 5k with some people from the fattest 5 cities. The contestants were inpirations to those people. I reme,ber when I used to be like that. Now I feel like it has become such a challenge and I have hit a brick wall. I am the only person who can break through the brick wall.

I know what I have to do it is just a matter of me doing it. I know I just need to give it all to God and it will all be ok. I know that I need to give EVERYTHING to Him and it will all be ok. You never really think you can with weightloss but I need to. I have really been struggling. I tell my friends but they really dont understand. Sometimes I found myself crying out for help one day and I just prayed. But I say I am going to do it and I dont. When I find myself eating 2 icecreams bars and not one. I need to pray that my stomach will feel full and not go for that second portion. I dont want to have these feelings with food I am having. This is hard but I can overcome it if I try really hard. I am going to because I just cant take anymore of it.

Michael said tonight he has had a drive to lose weight ever since he lost 34 the first week. Well I lost my drive and I want it back.

Tuesday 10

1. Seeing the people on Biggest Loser going through touble knowing I can make it through.
2. Seeing people on the Biggest Loser meeting milestones.
3. I have been applying for jobs I know God will lead me to the right one.
4. Spending Saturday with my friends!!
5. My sister and the nice things she does for me and what I do for her.
6. The smiths teaching sunday school for a couple of weeks about marriage
7. Jody and Rachel are engaged!!!
8. My mom and all the little things she does for me.
9. Finally applied for graduation
10. I cant wait for saturday to surprise my parents!!

Interesting Story

The phone rings at 8:10 am this morning at work and I thought someone was calling out for the day so I picked it up and answered it. It was not someone calling otherwise I wouldn't have answered the phone because we don't open until 8:30. It turns out to be this customer who needed help placing her book order online. I was like oh no an annoying call bright and early in the morning because orders have to placed online and people don't like to try. But I was friendly like always and met someone who could use someone. I found out in the course of the call that she has MS. She used to teach dance to 300 kids and now she is confined to her house most of the day. She goes to class one day a week and when she gets home she has to be in bed because she is so tired from walking. She counts the steps from her house to her car because it hurts a lot. She is from Minnesota and doesn't have many friends here. She just wanted someone to talk to. She even invited me to lunch but I didn't know what to say. She wanted to find a group of friends and I told her church is the best place to find a group of people but she went on to tell me how she is a liberal ulitarian. I really wasn't talking to her that much she was telling me. It was the most interesting 45 minute call of my morning and I will be praying for her. In the end I did help her with her order and she was very happy!

Tuesday 10

1. Got to spend time with my family at the game on friday.
2. Studied with friends this weekend!
3. I got my cap and gown!
4. The book I am reading at the gym When God writes your life story
5. My new book You ona diet it is teaching me a lot about what food does in your intestines
6. midterms are over
7. I got a job oportunity I am going to be applying for.
8. Making people laugh when they are down.
9. I hurt my knee but i still can exercise
10. I got my annuals from home depot hopefully planting them today

:)

Yesterday was a great day. I went to church as usual which makes me happy. But I also go to share with someone gospel. They really don't know what is real or what to believe. This is the first time I had a conversation with someone where they didn't argue with me they listened and were very open to it. I explained it all that is a relationship between God and I and that He loves me. I did it the old school way I shared the ABC's that I learned in Bible School. Which is where I gave my heart to the Lord at the end of that day by myself in my seat. It was really awesome and I told my friend about it and they gave me a good verse and encouraged me and asked for the persons name so they can pray for them. This is the first time I have shared the gospel and not been nervous. Even when I talk to my closest friends about my faith and what I believe and try to share the gospel with them I get nervous and shakey. But God just let the words flow without being nervous. I almost forgot the bible verse is Galatians 6:9. You know my blog is pretty cool because if you scroll over the bible verse it tells you what it says :)

Pastor had a pretty cool sermon about after the ressurection we can't forget what happened after. How the disciples got together and how Jesus gave the great commission. Pretty awesome stuff and pastor made it so vivid that I could picture it in my head the way he was saying it. Like when the disciples were meeting in the upper room and Jesus comes through the wall shows himself when they are breaking bread. Then he asks for fish and pastor was saying that the disciples must have been like he just came through a wall can he eat fish and he did. I have my notes at home now since I am at school and I will have to type them up it was a good sermon.

My day was good though I studied for my midterm with my friends which I just took. God is sooo good though since I might have a job opportunity that I hope works out for me I really need a new job but I know God will provide. Everything is going soo fast, graduation, grad school is coming, who knows what else is going to happen but I know God is good and thats all I need to know. He will work it all out like my favorite Chasen song says...Be still and know I am God. :) Its gonna be a great week!!!

Easter 2010

Wow what a great Easter! It was one of the best Easter sermons in awhile. Pastor talked about hope and how most people talk about hope in a doubtful way and the way we use the word is important. The biblical definition he gave of hope is assurance, a certain expectation. Biblical hope is resting in a promise that God says something will happen and it will. If you look at John 3:16 that is a promise of something that will happen. Pastor put tons of verses that had to do with hope, I will put them at the end if you just put your curser over them it will show them :) A Christian has hope in what Christ has done and will come back one day. Titus 3:5 is based on what he has done and not about what we do in life. Some people tell other people nothing is certain in life and that is false because God is certain about eternal life. Faith is being sure what we hope for. Faith is all about Jesus and trusting him what he did on the cross. Some people say "I need hope now" but they need to think about eternity too. I didnt write down the verse but it says "Hope in me for eternity and you can have hope now." If you give it all now you have hope forever. 1 Peter 1:3 It was an awesome sermon and helped me think about me using the word hope and I need to look about and see how I use it.

Verses: Romans 8:24 Romans 12:12 Romans 15:13 Romans 15:4 1 Corinthians 13 1 Corinthians 3:12 Ephesians 3:12 Ephesians 1:12 Ephesians 1:18 1 Timothy 4:10

Other than that I had an awesome day with my family. I love my family so much. I mean holidays are a lot of fun. We even have 2 new additions, Alissa my sister in law and Kimberly who we got to skype with today! I am thankful for my family and that we laugh and joke around and we even had an Easter egg hunt which we havent done in years! It was fun which I said like 5 times :)

He is Risen!! Easter one of my favorite holidays sooo happy for what Jesus did for everyone reminds me of the song Up from the grave he arose...